Oh. Hello. Sorry I wasn't here when you stopped by, my faithful readers.
I read somewhere that you shouldn't apologize for not updating your blog - to do so would be narcissistic and with the assumption that people were clicking on right and left, waiting for your words. But apologizing - or at least offering an excuse - feels like the least I can do, when people have been wondering and asking me where I've been.
I've been...uuuuhhh...busy. Yeah, busy...that's the ticket. I became busy in this final week of February.
There was a doctor's appointment, two dental appointments, two orthodontist appointments, several prescriptions to fill (2 pharmacies, crazy amount of waiting time), a few birthdays to shop for, the district science fair set up and (tonight) interview and judging, a Blue and Gold Banquet, a couple of English lessons with my new Iranian friend, Mah'naz, and all the other things that seem to take up my days.
Also, I've been watching Oliver discover the outside world in some delightful, dare-I-say, Spring-like weather and marveling that Cameron's mouth is now full of painful-looking metal, and that it is costing more to straighten his teeth than it did to adopt him.
It seemed the week went by in a flash - I hardly even sat down to the computer. See? Busy.
But everything is fine, life is good, and I hope that's true for you as well.
I bought a new scented oil for my Bath & Body Works oil warmer - Pineapple Mango. It's sweet and fruity and heightens my anticipation for Spring. It's making me happy.
What, in your busy life, is making you happy today?
Friday, February 29, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Movie Quote Monday
Good morning! This was left from last week (when y'all went to bed early), but it's so good, I'm starting off with it today.
"Well, these thighs haven't gone out of the house without lycra on them since I was 14."
"You were brought up right."
Go.
"Well, these thighs haven't gone out of the house without lycra on them since I was 14."
"You were brought up right."
Go.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
The Naughty Toddler
Oliver has quickly grown to over 11 pounds of puppy fun. He's about three months, which puts him at almost two years old in human years.
He's a furry toddler.
I remember when the boys were going through this stage and they wouldn't even let me go to the bathroom alone. It's pretty much the same with Oliver. If I shut the door on him, he cries and cries. If I let him in, he's just a little too curious. When I take a shower, he's peeking in to see what I'm doing.
The roll of toilet paper can't go on the spindle (as long as we can't remember to keep the door shut anyway) because Oliver can reach it and he'll have the time of his life doing this:
And this:
He tries to look all innocent when he's caught red-handed...
He won't hold still for pictures...
He's a furry toddler.
I remember when the boys were going through this stage and they wouldn't even let me go to the bathroom alone. It's pretty much the same with Oliver. If I shut the door on him, he cries and cries. If I let him in, he's just a little too curious. When I take a shower, he's peeking in to see what I'm doing.
The roll of toilet paper can't go on the spindle (as long as we can't remember to keep the door shut anyway) because Oliver can reach it and he'll have the time of his life doing this:
And this:He tries to look all innocent when he's caught red-handed...
He won't hold still for pictures...
He'd just as soon play with the box than with any of the toys we buy him...
But the craziest thing I have to do with Oliver that reminds me of when the boys were young, is the tiptoeing around when he's asleep - an elaborate game of Don't Wake the Baby.
Oliver sleeps with Cameron usually, and he's pretty good about sleeping through the night. But the second he hears anyone walking around in the morning, he's up and ready to begin the day. Not so good when I get up at 5:15. If Oliver gets up, I have to take the time to let him out and then he's not about to go back to sleep, and nobody else wants to wake up to be with him while I go to the gym. My whole goal first thing every morning is to sneak out of the house.
After my alarm goes off, I tiptoe down the hall and drop to a crawl in front of the boys' bedroom. The laundry basket props the door open, so I delicately push it until the door will swing shut. So, so quietly, I turn the knob and pull it into the frame.
Now I can get ready, but I'm still worried about the sound of water running and the garage door waking him up. I'm like a burglar moving through my own home. At least when the boys were babies, if they woke up I could throw them in bed with Troy, move his arm so it was propping the bottle, and be on my way. That doesn't quite work with Oliver.
Every day that I can make it out of the house without waking him up feels like a tiny miracle. Woo Hoo! I'm so easy to please.
Gotta go. I think Oliver's learned to open the cabinet under the bathroom sink. Time to install those cabinet locks again.
Definitely a toddler. At least there are no diapers.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
In Stores Now
Heaven help me, not only is the Valentine's candy 75% off, this is in the stores now:
May I present, the
Easter Trinity of Temptation:
Shiny, solid, name brands only.
Chocolate and peanut butter. 'Nuff said.
Remember licking the pastel shell and rubbing it across your lips like funky blue lipstick?
Me too.
Jelly Beans and Peeps? Please.
Note to Self: Stay out of the stores.
What do you find irresistable as far as Easter candy goes?
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Tagged Again
My friend and frequent commenter on Movie Quote Monday, Pinklady, tagged me last week. So just in case there's anything else I haven't already told you...
Ten years ago I was: 29. Cameron had just turned one and I was happily immersing myself in Mommyhood. Seriously, I was having the time of my life with him. I worked at the sign company (part owners) just 2-3 days a week and my sister, Kelly watched him for us. I was Young Women's president in our ward. We were finishing all the paperwork to adopt another baby, and I was getting excited to open up our adoption with Cameron's birthmom. I was happy with my weight (this is significant only because I can pretty much tell you my weight and pants size at every age, also what diet I was following. There have been fluctuations.) and I was doing a step class 3x a week. I was trying my hand at scrapbooking.
5 things on my to-do list:
1. I need to clean out our storage room. This will still be on my list a year from now, just wait.
2. Make a dentist appointment for Troy. He says something's brewing in his mouth, and that's not good. I think I'm still paying on his last dental bill.
3. Continue building up my food storage. The boys call it the grocery store in the basement.
4. Catch up on my tivo. I'm waiting for Troy to be home so we can watch American Idol and Lost together.
5. You know there's some laundry to fold. That is the absolute first thing on my list today. Okay, after I'm done blogging. And after I get back from Sam's Club. And after I do some dishes. Maybe I'll get to it.
3 bad habits:
1. I'm too critical of myself.
2. I let the waiting-to-be-folded laundry pile up. Oh, you probably already know that, so that doesn't count.
2. I spend what we earn in a paycheck to paycheck kind of way. Getting better on that one.
3. I correct Troy's grammar. I can't help myself. He replaces the word loan with borrow, as in "Will you borrow me your nail gun?", and it's like fingernails on a chalkboard until I blurt out the correct phrase. I think he's just doing it to bug me.
If I suddenly became a billionaire: I'd be debt free, with awesome savings and retirement accounts. My family would be debt free. Missions and college would be paid for. That doesn't even touch it, does it? I need to start dreaming bigger.
Ten years ago I was: 29. Cameron had just turned one and I was happily immersing myself in Mommyhood. Seriously, I was having the time of my life with him. I worked at the sign company (part owners) just 2-3 days a week and my sister, Kelly watched him for us. I was Young Women's president in our ward. We were finishing all the paperwork to adopt another baby, and I was getting excited to open up our adoption with Cameron's birthmom. I was happy with my weight (this is significant only because I can pretty much tell you my weight and pants size at every age, also what diet I was following. There have been fluctuations.) and I was doing a step class 3x a week. I was trying my hand at scrapbooking.
5 things on my to-do list:
1. I need to clean out our storage room. This will still be on my list a year from now, just wait.
2. Make a dentist appointment for Troy. He says something's brewing in his mouth, and that's not good. I think I'm still paying on his last dental bill.
3. Continue building up my food storage. The boys call it the grocery store in the basement.
4. Catch up on my tivo. I'm waiting for Troy to be home so we can watch American Idol and Lost together.
5. You know there's some laundry to fold. That is the absolute first thing on my list today. Okay, after I'm done blogging. And after I get back from Sam's Club. And after I do some dishes. Maybe I'll get to it.
3 bad habits:
1. I'm too critical of myself.
2. I let the waiting-to-be-folded laundry pile up. Oh, you probably already know that, so that doesn't count.
2. I spend what we earn in a paycheck to paycheck kind of way. Getting better on that one.
3. I correct Troy's grammar. I can't help myself. He replaces the word loan with borrow, as in "Will you borrow me your nail gun?", and it's like fingernails on a chalkboard until I blurt out the correct phrase. I think he's just doing it to bug me.
If I suddenly became a billionaire: I'd be debt free, with awesome savings and retirement accounts. My family would be debt free. Missions and college would be paid for. That doesn't even touch it, does it? I need to start dreaming bigger.
Things I like to snack on: Well, is it a healthy day or an I don't care kind of a day? If it's a healthy snack, I like blueberries, edamame, and Baked Tostitos Scoops with Walmart brand Peach Pineapple Chipotle Salsa (don't knock it till you've tried it). But I can eat an entire bag of those chips and a whole bottle of that salsa at one time, so that kind of crosses it off the healthy side. If I'm throwing all calories to the wind, I love ice cream, chocolate, chips and dip or salsa, and Flamin' Hot Cheetos. I have no portion control and I need to balance the sweet with the salty.
Places I've lived: Speedway, Indiana - you could hear the racecars going around the track; Salt Lake City, Utah, then on to Sacramento and San Jose, California, and then back to Utah.
Things people don't know about me: I've never had my nails done. I still have a baby tooth that never fell out. That's it...I think I've told everything about me. If there's anything you want to know, go ahead and ask.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Movie Quote Monday
Good Morning! Do you have the day off? I do, but no big plans, so I thought I'd start the day off with a little...
"I always knew you were alive, I knew it. Everybody said that I had to let you go. I love you. You're the love of my life."
Go.
"I always knew you were alive, I knew it. Everybody said that I had to let you go. I love you. You're the love of my life."
Go.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad
32 years!!!!!
Yes, my parents were married on Valentine's Day, which I always thought was very romantic - an entire holiday centered around them.
They had a whirlwind romance: He lived in California, she lived in Utah with her two daughters, (the youngest of which was particularly sweet) and they were set up on a blind "date" phone call. One phone call led to another and then another and then another. This was before free weekend minutes and unlimited long distance. It was a full-price long distance romance.
I hate that I don't know more specific details (help me out, family) about how it all came together, but the next thing we knew, they were getting married. And I really hate that I don't have one of their wedding pictures to put up - it was the 70's, so you know it's good.
But check them out now - don't they look amazing? And they are in love. It's the real deal, hand-holding, door opening, good-bye and hello kissing, I made you a cherry pie, I gassed up your car for you, let's take a walk together, flat-out adoring kind of love.
They had a whirlwind romance: He lived in California, she lived in Utah with her two daughters, (the youngest of which was particularly sweet) and they were set up on a blind "date" phone call. One phone call led to another and then another and then another. This was before free weekend minutes and unlimited long distance. It was a full-price long distance romance.
I hate that I don't know more specific details (help me out, family) about how it all came together, but the next thing we knew, they were getting married. And I really hate that I don't have one of their wedding pictures to put up - it was the 70's, so you know it's good.
But check them out now - don't they look amazing? And they are in love. It's the real deal, hand-holding, door opening, good-bye and hello kissing, I made you a cherry pie, I gassed up your car for you, let's take a walk together, flat-out adoring kind of love.
How cute are they?
Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad. Thanks for your example of a happy marriage, of care and concern, of respect and romance, and true, true love.
May we all be so lucky.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
And One More On Aaron
Aaron ran up the stairs the other morning and came into the kitchen. I was sitting at the table (my own little computer nook) and I was partially obscured by the bread machine that was busy making dough on the counter. (note: this was two weeks ago...I'm not eating white bread this week.)
He walked over to the sink and paused. He didn't see me so he was pretty much talking to himself.
"Any clean dishes?" He opened up the cupboard to check.
"Ooooooo!"
There were, in fact, clean dishes. His "Ooooooo" was kind of high pitched and excited - the same sound I make when there are good magazines in a waiting room or someone offers me a brownie. (I would decline this week...I'm also not eating chocolate-flavored flour.)
"Finally...clean dishes."
Then he reached into the cupboard, pulled out a glass, and got himself a drink of water. He went back downstairs - taking it with him, where there are, no doubt, a dozen empty glasses.
You should hear his excitement over clean socks in his drawer.
That's my Aaron.
He walked over to the sink and paused. He didn't see me so he was pretty much talking to himself.
"Any clean dishes?" He opened up the cupboard to check.
"Ooooooo!"
There were, in fact, clean dishes. His "Ooooooo" was kind of high pitched and excited - the same sound I make when there are good magazines in a waiting room or someone offers me a brownie. (I would decline this week...I'm also not eating chocolate-flavored flour.)
"Finally...clean dishes."
Then he reached into the cupboard, pulled out a glass, and got himself a drink of water. He went back downstairs - taking it with him, where there are, no doubt, a dozen empty glasses.
You should hear his excitement over clean socks in his drawer.
That's my Aaron.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
"No Mommy, Not The Toys!!!!"
The boys have been off track for the past three weeks and they have thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to stay up late, sleep in, hang out in pajama pants (or underwear and a blanket), play their games and watch their shows, and generally live a life of leisure. Ahhh, childhood.
The only thing I really required of them during this little vacation, was that they feed themselves breakfast and complete a short list of chores while I'm at work every morning. I get home around noon, so even if they slept until 11 (easily done), they could still get everything done before I showed up. Bonus for me - if there is any complaining about who has to do what or how unfair this whole chore business is, I don't have to listen to it.
I kept things pretty basic:
make bed
brush teeth and shower (they are boys, after all, and likely to forget)
unload the dishwasher
separate laundry
fold towels (I haven't folded any towels in 3 weeks!!!)
put away stacks of folded clothes
do 30 minutes of reading
eat (I swear they wouldn't if I didn't remind them!)
take out garbage
do the recycling
general pick up
anything else I could of as I'm heading out the door
See, nothing too tough or overwhelming. And to their credit, they completed the list every single day.
Except one.
Bothered by the fact that we own a billion (rough figure) toys and yet, all they ever seem to do with any regularity is play on the computer, I added this to the To Do List:
Play with toys for 45 minutes
I was kinda kidding, but kinda not. It was just there on the list with everything else I expected them to do.
Aaron, who takes everything very literally, worked hard to get it done.
A few minutes after I got home, he moped over to me andsaid whined,
"I've been playing with toys since 11:30...can't I stop now. Isn't this long enough???"
Well, I'm just a big softy, so I let him off the hook.
He ran down the stairs, jumping over the bottom three steps, his arms raised triumphantly.
"Woo Hoo!! I don't have to play with toys anymore!!
He'll do a dozen real chores without so much as a groan, just don't make him play with toys. Go figure.
The only thing I really required of them during this little vacation, was that they feed themselves breakfast and complete a short list of chores while I'm at work every morning. I get home around noon, so even if they slept until 11 (easily done), they could still get everything done before I showed up. Bonus for me - if there is any complaining about who has to do what or how unfair this whole chore business is, I don't have to listen to it.
I kept things pretty basic:
make bed
brush teeth and shower (they are boys, after all, and likely to forget)
unload the dishwasher
separate laundry
fold towels (I haven't folded any towels in 3 weeks!!!)
put away stacks of folded clothes
do 30 minutes of reading
eat (I swear they wouldn't if I didn't remind them!)
take out garbage
do the recycling
general pick up
anything else I could of as I'm heading out the door
See, nothing too tough or overwhelming. And to their credit, they completed the list every single day.
Except one.
Bothered by the fact that we own a billion (rough figure) toys and yet, all they ever seem to do with any regularity is play on the computer, I added this to the To Do List:
Play with toys for 45 minutes
I was kinda kidding, but kinda not. It was just there on the list with everything else I expected them to do.
Aaron, who takes everything very literally, worked hard to get it done.
A few minutes after I got home, he moped over to me and
"I've been playing with toys since 11:30...can't I stop now. Isn't this long enough???"
Well, I'm just a big softy, so I let him off the hook.
He ran down the stairs, jumping over the bottom three steps, his arms raised triumphantly.
"Woo Hoo!! I don't have to play with toys anymore!!
He'll do a dozen real chores without so much as a groan, just don't make him play with toys. Go figure.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Movie Quote Monday
Good morning!
Get your quotes ready...
"You're right! You're not your dad! He could sell a ketchup Popsicle to a woman in white gloves!"
Go.
Get your quotes ready...
"You're right! You're not your dad! He could sell a ketchup Popsicle to a woman in white gloves!"
Go.
Friday, February 8, 2008
The Oddest Thing
Troy had an unexpected day off in the middle of the week - which is actually what we've come to expect this winter. When a bad storm is raging over Donner's Pass, he waits a day before heading out. It saves him driving time, it's safer, and gives him a chance to take care of things that are on his "I'll get around to it" list.
And of course, one of my anti-sway arms was out (oh whatever!!), and the whole thing ended up costing slightly less than my mortgage payment. Kind of bitter about that.
I went out to oooooh and ahhhhh over my new tires and to give Troy a kiss for caring about our safety. He handed me a bag.
It also means that I have to cook a for-real meal two nights in a row.
But that's beside the point.
With two whole days, Troy's been super productive.
He has:
- changed a few high light bulbs
- fixed the stuck stopper in the bathroom sink drain so we won't have to brush our teeth and spit in the tub.
- cleaned out the slow-draining drain in the tub. It's my hair that's clogging it - sorry, Babe.
- done our taxes
- vacuumed - he's good like that
- played the Crack with the boys, and
- bought new tires for my Explorer
I've needed new tires all winter. Man, I hate spending money on tires. Hate spending money on cars, period. But I really really really did need new tires. It's been a slippery, slidey, snowy winter - we couldn't put it off any longer.
He and Aaron drove off on the bald tires and went to see Les Schwab Tires. Les would cost less, Troy assured me.
Couple hours later they came back home. Four brand-spankin' new, shiny black tires. 235/R17 Toyo All Terrain, white walls out - just in case any men read this.
And of course, one of my anti-sway arms was out (oh whatever!!), and the whole thing ended up costing slightly less than my mortgage payment. Kind of bitter about that.I went out to oooooh and ahhhhh over my new tires and to give Troy a kiss for caring about our safety. He handed me a bag.
"Here. I brought you something."
The bag was much too heavy for the standard "here, I brought you something" Reese's Peanut Butter Cup or bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos with Limon. I peered inside.
"What the...?"
"They gave it to me. For buying the tires."
Really.
Two pounds.
Now, is that just the oddest thing you've ever heard of?
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Few Things Are More Pitiful...
Than Oliver after a bath.
Do you see a resemblance?
What is Oliver thinking right now?
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Part II: Will Juror #2 Please Stop Rolling Her Eyes While the Witness Is Speaking
Just kidding. The judge didn't really say that to me- but only because my eye rolling wasn't the most blatant and obvious. The policeman (witness for the prosecution) was not only rolling his eyes, he was stifling laughs and Juror# 4 was expressing herself in exasperated sighs.
It was a very interesting day in court. And by interesting, I mean that I was mentally blogging it.
As soon as the door shut behind those who weren't chosen, we were sworn in, given badges to wear around our necks and notepads and pens. We were instructed to wear the badges for the rest of the day, even when we were released for lunch, so that the general public would know not to talk to us if they saw us leaving the courthouse.
Public shunning, mmm hmmm.
We also got a very stern lecture about not talking about the case with each other before all the parts had been played out. We'd have lots of breaks and opportunities to talk, but until it was over, the trial and anything relating to the trial was off limits.
We were reminded several times that just because the defendant was here today, did not mean that she was guilty in any way.
The Prosecution started things off with her opening statements. She introduced us to the defendant, Miss Sad and Remorseful, and explained that she was arrested last summer after being observed not staying in her lane (she was driving down a Trax track!!!) and after field sobriety tests and a breathalyzer showed her to be impaired and over the legal limit. Two policemen would be called as witnesses, and she (the Prosecutor) knew that we would find in favor of the state.
Next up was the Cutest Attorney In the World. He smiled his gleaming smile as he walked across the courtroom. He was friendly and slick, reminded me a little of Matthew McConaughey in How to Lose A Guy In 10 Days. He re-introduced us to Miss Sad and Remorseful, and then explained how poor signage was the cause of her Trax driving, and the policemen were exaggerating the results of the field sobriety tests, and the breathalyzer - must've been not working properly that night. He believed that we would find her not guilty.
And then we had to go to lunch and not talk about what we'd just seen and heard.
We walked to Burger King (court didn't even buy us lunch!) and the four of us sat in a booth and tried to talk about anything except the trial. We talked about President Hinckley, the weather, and what each of us would be doing if we weren't here for the day. I was dying to talk about the trial - it was all I could think about!
We went back to our little waiting room - we were officially sequestered. It was a small, cramped room with two windows that were near the ceilings. We were locked in. There was a small fridge with some pop and water bottles, and a basket with Cheese Nips, peanut butter crackers and fake Oreos. We had to knock on the door for the baliff to let us out to go to the bathroom. We wondered how we'd get out in case of a fire. Still couldn't talk about the trial.
Finally the baliff came in and said that they were ready for us. We had to stay in a single file line, in the same order, for the whole day. We went down two flights of stairs and through a bunch of cubicle office spaces to get to the courtroom. The gravelly-voiced woman had arthritis in both knees and had a really hard time on the stairs. Each time we had to travel between the courtroom and the sequestering room, it took a good 5 minutes. We all shuffled along - it looked like March of the Penguins. When we made it to the courtroom, the baliff opened the door and asked that everyone stand as we walked in. That was kind of cool. I felt like I should wave or something.
Okay, down to business.
First witness was the police officer that pulled the defendant over. She drew on a white board how she had seen her driving down the Trax line, realize the mistake and back off the tracks. When she pulled her over, she noticed Miss Sad and Remorseful was chewing gum very fast and was holding her hand over her mouth.
Did you know that drunk people do that to hide the smell of alcohol? Geez, I chew gum all the time - breath paranoia.
The officer could smell alcohol anyway and called for backup - another officer who specialized in field sobriety tests.
He was the next witness and he explained how he did the tests, arrested her and impounded her car. At the police station, he administered another breathalyzer test and her results were .118. Utah limit is .08.
Time for the cross-examination, and this is when I decided that The Cutest Attorney In the World was kind of a putz.
He was so rude to the police officers! He did his best to make them look like they didn't know what they were doing and that they were exaggerating how drunk the defendant was. He questioned everything they did and every report they filed, all with such an air of smugness. Instead of making the witnesses look less believable, it just made him look desperate and rude.
I know this is how the whole process works, picking apart each side -- I've seen Legally Blonde many times -- but it just made me uncomfortable to see it in person.
Another reason I didn't like the Cutest Attorney In the World - he kept objecting to things the prosecutor was saying. He would interrupt her and then he would make a small show of laughing at her. Again, part of the process, but it just seemed so rude and bossy of him. In any other circumstance, she would have clawed his eyes out and told him to shut the crap up! He was really bugging me.
More breaks, more stairs, more Cheese Nips. No talking about what we were all thinking: why are we even here? The lady was drunk and driving!
Okay, now it was time for the Defense. The one thing that The Cutest Attorney In the World did well, I guess, was to coach Miss Sad and Remorseful on how to look and how to make constant not-guilty eyes at the jury members. I was sitting in a spot where she could see me and one other juror. I don't think she took her eyes off of us once. She looked so pitiful and like she was going to cry at any minute. I could tell that she was waiting to make eye contact and it kind of creeped me out. But I guess that's how you're supposed to look when you are the defendant.
She took the stand and explained that she had been drinking - but not enough to be drunk. The reason she did so poorly on the balance test and walking test was because she was in flip flops.
The next witness for the defense was an "expert", aka, a paid witness. He was a rumpled private investigator that had taken a "course" on how to determine the level of impairment after a person has been drinking. Without that pesky, usually-wrong breathalyzer thingy that the rest of the country uses.
He had a briefcase and stacks of papers that he waved in the air from time to time. It was during his testimony that the eye rolling and stifled laughs started.
Seriously, I think this paid witness hurt her case more than it helped.
In the end, The Cutest Attorney In the World made a statement along these lines:
"You know, my brother makes some pretty sound decisions in his life. Because of those decisions, he's able to buy some really nice things. One of those things is a brand new BMW. It's an amazing car with all the bells and whistles, the best German-made car you can buy. Well, one day, a light came on, telling my brother that that driver's side window was down. But he could tell (slaps his hand against the podium) that it was closed. Sometimes, equipment fails. It's just wrong. It doesn't tell the truth. And that's what happened that night last summer. The breathalyzer wasn't working properly and if you know that, you will have to find the defendant, not guilty."
Yeah, the prosecutor made sure we had copies of the maintenance papers on the breathalyzer, showing that it was in perfect working condition two weeks before and two weeks after. We also had the defendant's flip flops, just in case we wanted to try to walk in a straight line while wearing them. Not that hard.
It was over. All the questioning and objecting, the pleading looks from the defendant, and the Fall of the Cutest Attorney In the World. My crush was so over. Now he just irritated me.
We went back to our little room - finally we could talk about it. By now it was a little past 6 o'clock at night. The court gave us a menu from a pizza place and told us to order, but none of the other jurors wanted to order anything - they just wanted to be done. I should have spoken up, ordered a whole pizza and taken it home to my boys (who had been alone all day), but I didn't.
We talked for about 5 minutes, made sure that we all felt the same way, no question about it...GUILTY!!!
We filed into the courtroom one last time. It's true what they say about it being uncomfortable to look at the defendant when you are bringing a guilty verdict. So I didn't.
We said guilty, the court thanked us, and we left.
It was dark outside, snowing, and the wet streets were full of headlight glare. Just my kind of driving conditions. I made it home, tense and tired, and $18.50 in my pocket. I'd been gone for a little over 12 hours.
I learned a lot, it was interesting, and I was glad it was over in one day. I was also glad that it was so cut and dried, no question or doubt that the lady was drunk and had used poor judgement in getting behind the wheel. I was glad no one had been hurt.
Obviously, I have a hard time separating facts from how a person looks or acts and how they treat other people. I'm not good at this kind of thing. But I did my civic duty and I won't have to do it again for at least two years.
And if you've made it all the way to the end of this tale, I will forever call you The Most Awesome Readers In the World. You're my new crush.
It was a very interesting day in court. And by interesting, I mean that I was mentally blogging it.
As soon as the door shut behind those who weren't chosen, we were sworn in, given badges to wear around our necks and notepads and pens. We were instructed to wear the badges for the rest of the day, even when we were released for lunch, so that the general public would know not to talk to us if they saw us leaving the courthouse.
Public shunning, mmm hmmm.
We also got a very stern lecture about not talking about the case with each other before all the parts had been played out. We'd have lots of breaks and opportunities to talk, but until it was over, the trial and anything relating to the trial was off limits.
We were reminded several times that just because the defendant was here today, did not mean that she was guilty in any way.
The Prosecution started things off with her opening statements. She introduced us to the defendant, Miss Sad and Remorseful, and explained that she was arrested last summer after being observed not staying in her lane (she was driving down a Trax track!!!) and after field sobriety tests and a breathalyzer showed her to be impaired and over the legal limit. Two policemen would be called as witnesses, and she (the Prosecutor) knew that we would find in favor of the state.
Next up was the Cutest Attorney In the World. He smiled his gleaming smile as he walked across the courtroom. He was friendly and slick, reminded me a little of Matthew McConaughey in How to Lose A Guy In 10 Days. He re-introduced us to Miss Sad and Remorseful, and then explained how poor signage was the cause of her Trax driving, and the policemen were exaggerating the results of the field sobriety tests, and the breathalyzer - must've been not working properly that night. He believed that we would find her not guilty.
And then we had to go to lunch and not talk about what we'd just seen and heard.
We walked to Burger King (court didn't even buy us lunch!) and the four of us sat in a booth and tried to talk about anything except the trial. We talked about President Hinckley, the weather, and what each of us would be doing if we weren't here for the day. I was dying to talk about the trial - it was all I could think about!
We went back to our little waiting room - we were officially sequestered. It was a small, cramped room with two windows that were near the ceilings. We were locked in. There was a small fridge with some pop and water bottles, and a basket with Cheese Nips, peanut butter crackers and fake Oreos. We had to knock on the door for the baliff to let us out to go to the bathroom. We wondered how we'd get out in case of a fire. Still couldn't talk about the trial.
Finally the baliff came in and said that they were ready for us. We had to stay in a single file line, in the same order, for the whole day. We went down two flights of stairs and through a bunch of cubicle office spaces to get to the courtroom. The gravelly-voiced woman had arthritis in both knees and had a really hard time on the stairs. Each time we had to travel between the courtroom and the sequestering room, it took a good 5 minutes. We all shuffled along - it looked like March of the Penguins. When we made it to the courtroom, the baliff opened the door and asked that everyone stand as we walked in. That was kind of cool. I felt like I should wave or something.
Okay, down to business.
First witness was the police officer that pulled the defendant over. She drew on a white board how she had seen her driving down the Trax line, realize the mistake and back off the tracks. When she pulled her over, she noticed Miss Sad and Remorseful was chewing gum very fast and was holding her hand over her mouth.
Did you know that drunk people do that to hide the smell of alcohol? Geez, I chew gum all the time - breath paranoia.
The officer could smell alcohol anyway and called for backup - another officer who specialized in field sobriety tests.
He was the next witness and he explained how he did the tests, arrested her and impounded her car. At the police station, he administered another breathalyzer test and her results were .118. Utah limit is .08.
Time for the cross-examination, and this is when I decided that The Cutest Attorney In the World was kind of a putz.
He was so rude to the police officers! He did his best to make them look like they didn't know what they were doing and that they were exaggerating how drunk the defendant was. He questioned everything they did and every report they filed, all with such an air of smugness. Instead of making the witnesses look less believable, it just made him look desperate and rude.
I know this is how the whole process works, picking apart each side -- I've seen Legally Blonde many times -- but it just made me uncomfortable to see it in person.
Another reason I didn't like the Cutest Attorney In the World - he kept objecting to things the prosecutor was saying. He would interrupt her and then he would make a small show of laughing at her. Again, part of the process, but it just seemed so rude and bossy of him. In any other circumstance, she would have clawed his eyes out and told him to shut the crap up! He was really bugging me.
More breaks, more stairs, more Cheese Nips. No talking about what we were all thinking: why are we even here? The lady was drunk and driving!
Okay, now it was time for the Defense. The one thing that The Cutest Attorney In the World did well, I guess, was to coach Miss Sad and Remorseful on how to look and how to make constant not-guilty eyes at the jury members. I was sitting in a spot where she could see me and one other juror. I don't think she took her eyes off of us once. She looked so pitiful and like she was going to cry at any minute. I could tell that she was waiting to make eye contact and it kind of creeped me out. But I guess that's how you're supposed to look when you are the defendant.
She took the stand and explained that she had been drinking - but not enough to be drunk. The reason she did so poorly on the balance test and walking test was because she was in flip flops.
The next witness for the defense was an "expert", aka, a paid witness. He was a rumpled private investigator that had taken a "course" on how to determine the level of impairment after a person has been drinking. Without that pesky, usually-wrong breathalyzer thingy that the rest of the country uses.
He had a briefcase and stacks of papers that he waved in the air from time to time. It was during his testimony that the eye rolling and stifled laughs started.
Seriously, I think this paid witness hurt her case more than it helped.
In the end, The Cutest Attorney In the World made a statement along these lines:
"You know, my brother makes some pretty sound decisions in his life. Because of those decisions, he's able to buy some really nice things. One of those things is a brand new BMW. It's an amazing car with all the bells and whistles, the best German-made car you can buy. Well, one day, a light came on, telling my brother that that driver's side window was down. But he could tell (slaps his hand against the podium) that it was closed. Sometimes, equipment fails. It's just wrong. It doesn't tell the truth. And that's what happened that night last summer. The breathalyzer wasn't working properly and if you know that, you will have to find the defendant, not guilty."
Yeah, the prosecutor made sure we had copies of the maintenance papers on the breathalyzer, showing that it was in perfect working condition two weeks before and two weeks after. We also had the defendant's flip flops, just in case we wanted to try to walk in a straight line while wearing them. Not that hard.
It was over. All the questioning and objecting, the pleading looks from the defendant, and the Fall of the Cutest Attorney In the World. My crush was so over. Now he just irritated me.
We went back to our little room - finally we could talk about it. By now it was a little past 6 o'clock at night. The court gave us a menu from a pizza place and told us to order, but none of the other jurors wanted to order anything - they just wanted to be done. I should have spoken up, ordered a whole pizza and taken it home to my boys (who had been alone all day), but I didn't.
We talked for about 5 minutes, made sure that we all felt the same way, no question about it...GUILTY!!!
We filed into the courtroom one last time. It's true what they say about it being uncomfortable to look at the defendant when you are bringing a guilty verdict. So I didn't.
We said guilty, the court thanked us, and we left.
It was dark outside, snowing, and the wet streets were full of headlight glare. Just my kind of driving conditions. I made it home, tense and tired, and $18.50 in my pocket. I'd been gone for a little over 12 hours.
I learned a lot, it was interesting, and I was glad it was over in one day. I was also glad that it was so cut and dried, no question or doubt that the lady was drunk and had used poor judgement in getting behind the wheel. I was glad no one had been hurt.
Obviously, I have a hard time separating facts from how a person looks or acts and how they treat other people. I'm not good at this kind of thing. But I did my civic duty and I won't have to do it again for at least two years.
And if you've made it all the way to the end of this tale, I will forever call you The Most Awesome Readers In the World. You're my new crush.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Jury Duty, Part I
After the drama of getting downtown for jury duty, I was relieved to have some time to just sit and let my heart get back to its normal rhythm. I had a good thirty minutes, so I settled into a bench in the courtroom, read my Reader's Digest, and waited to be sent home. The rest of the potential jurors eventually came in and we sat around not making eye contact. There were 30 of us. Coffee and Nutrigrain bars were on a table if we wanted.
Things got going a few minutes after 8:30: roll was taken and we got to watch a movie about not being upset if we weren't chosen for jury duty that day. Really. The movie was from 80's and the hairstyles and all the Sally Jesse Raphael glasses made it tolerable to watch if only for a chuckle.
After the movie, a baliff came in to watch over us. Unable to stand the quiet, he started telling jokes. Horrible, horrible jokes.
"What's the difference between out-laws and in-laws? Outlaws are wanted."
Ba dump bomp chhhhhh
"What lies on the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck."
Ba dump bomp chhhhhh
And the not quite politically correct,
"A guy marries a Chinese woman and for their honeymoon, she takes him to China to meet her family. He meets her Chinese parents, her Chinese brothers and sisters, and her Chinese grandparents. They don't like him and make them get a quickie Chinese divorce. Poor guy went home disoriented."
We all laughed uncomfortably - he had a gun.
Some lady came in and rescued us from the baliff's second act - we were sworn in and promised to answer truthfully all day long. We filled out some paperwork and then stood in line to receive our $18.50 for coming in. Next, we lined up in a specific order and made our way into another courtroom. Everyone was there - the judge, the prosecuting attorney (the state), a few police officers, the defense attorney and one very sad and remorseful looking woman (the defendant).
Time to pick the jury. The judge asked all these questions and we were supposed to answer by raising a hand. The two attorneys made notes of everyone's responses. If anyone raised their hand, they had to elaborate. It was like a public confession.
Judge: Do any of you belong to a religion that prohibits the use of alcohol? Do any of you drink? How much? Ever been impaired by your use of alcohol? Any family members drink? Who? Any alcoholism? Who? Have you ever seen a drunk person or spent any time with one? Any DUIs?
And on and on. Pretty sure it's a DUI case by this point. People were raising their hands, confessing everything about themselves, family and friends. Every once in a while the judge and the attorneys would take a person into a little room and ask more questions about their experience and knowledge of alcohol.
The judge had a final question: Is there anything about any of the people in the courtroom that might cause you to be unable to make a fair and impartial decision?
This was the question that made me pause.
It was the defense attorney. He wasn't just handsome, he was gorgeous - like a movie star. He had the highlighted hair, the perfect white teeth, the tan, the suit, and he kept smiling and making eye contact with everyone as he wrote his little notes. He was laid back and friendly, casual and charismatic, and he seemed to have the charm of Tom Cruise - before Tom got a little scary.
Since most of the questions didn't apply to me or anyone that I know, I spent a good part of this questioning time just gazing at him. Hmmmmm. Every time he looked at me, I was already looking at him and then he would smile his beautiful smile and I'd have to look away, embarassed.
So when the judge asked her question about making a fair and partial decision even though the Cutest Attorney In the World kept smiling at me, I wondered if I should raise my hand. I didn't, but only because I didn't want to have to go in the little room and admit to the judge that I had a crush on the defense attorney and would pretty much believe anything he told me.
Also, I had a tiny feeling that the Cutest Attorney In the World knows that he is the Cutest Attorney In the World. And that kind of ruined it. Almost.
So after all the questions and confessions, the judge and the two attorneys talked it over and came up with their four person jury. That's right, four people - out of thirty. And I was one of them. I should be playing the lottery.
We stood up and walked to the jury box. It was me, a grandma who worked for the Tablernacle Choir (this was two days after President Hinckley died - she coulda maybe gotten out of this), a 23 year old guy who was missing his classes at the community college and his wife's birthday, and an older woman with a gravelly-voice, bloodshot eyes, and possibly a hangover.
By now it was 11 am. The 26 who were not chosen were excused. They patted the $18.50 in their pockets as they walked out the doors and back to their lives. They didn't feel badly about not being chosen - the movie had helped, I'm sure.
I, on the other hand, was feeling something along the lines of
"You have GOT to be kidding me."
Jury duty.
For real.
This is what clean livin' will get you.
(To be continued...)
Things got going a few minutes after 8:30: roll was taken and we got to watch a movie about not being upset if we weren't chosen for jury duty that day. Really. The movie was from 80's and the hairstyles and all the Sally Jesse Raphael glasses made it tolerable to watch if only for a chuckle.
After the movie, a baliff came in to watch over us. Unable to stand the quiet, he started telling jokes. Horrible, horrible jokes.
"What's the difference between out-laws and in-laws? Outlaws are wanted."
Ba dump bomp chhhhhh
"What lies on the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck."
Ba dump bomp chhhhhh
And the not quite politically correct,
"A guy marries a Chinese woman and for their honeymoon, she takes him to China to meet her family. He meets her Chinese parents, her Chinese brothers and sisters, and her Chinese grandparents. They don't like him and make them get a quickie Chinese divorce. Poor guy went home disoriented."
We all laughed uncomfortably - he had a gun.
Some lady came in and rescued us from the baliff's second act - we were sworn in and promised to answer truthfully all day long. We filled out some paperwork and then stood in line to receive our $18.50 for coming in. Next, we lined up in a specific order and made our way into another courtroom. Everyone was there - the judge, the prosecuting attorney (the state), a few police officers, the defense attorney and one very sad and remorseful looking woman (the defendant).
Time to pick the jury. The judge asked all these questions and we were supposed to answer by raising a hand. The two attorneys made notes of everyone's responses. If anyone raised their hand, they had to elaborate. It was like a public confession.
Judge: Do any of you belong to a religion that prohibits the use of alcohol? Do any of you drink? How much? Ever been impaired by your use of alcohol? Any family members drink? Who? Any alcoholism? Who? Have you ever seen a drunk person or spent any time with one? Any DUIs?
And on and on. Pretty sure it's a DUI case by this point. People were raising their hands, confessing everything about themselves, family and friends. Every once in a while the judge and the attorneys would take a person into a little room and ask more questions about their experience and knowledge of alcohol.
The judge had a final question: Is there anything about any of the people in the courtroom that might cause you to be unable to make a fair and impartial decision?
This was the question that made me pause.
It was the defense attorney. He wasn't just handsome, he was gorgeous - like a movie star. He had the highlighted hair, the perfect white teeth, the tan, the suit, and he kept smiling and making eye contact with everyone as he wrote his little notes. He was laid back and friendly, casual and charismatic, and he seemed to have the charm of Tom Cruise - before Tom got a little scary.
Since most of the questions didn't apply to me or anyone that I know, I spent a good part of this questioning time just gazing at him. Hmmmmm. Every time he looked at me, I was already looking at him and then he would smile his beautiful smile and I'd have to look away, embarassed.
So when the judge asked her question about making a fair and partial decision even though the Cutest Attorney In the World kept smiling at me, I wondered if I should raise my hand. I didn't, but only because I didn't want to have to go in the little room and admit to the judge that I had a crush on the defense attorney and would pretty much believe anything he told me.
Also, I had a tiny feeling that the Cutest Attorney In the World knows that he is the Cutest Attorney In the World. And that kind of ruined it. Almost.
So after all the questions and confessions, the judge and the two attorneys talked it over and came up with their four person jury. That's right, four people - out of thirty. And I was one of them. I should be playing the lottery.
We stood up and walked to the jury box. It was me, a grandma who worked for the Tablernacle Choir (this was two days after President Hinckley died - she coulda maybe gotten out of this), a 23 year old guy who was missing his classes at the community college and his wife's birthday, and an older woman with a gravelly-voice, bloodshot eyes, and possibly a hangover.
By now it was 11 am. The 26 who were not chosen were excused. They patted the $18.50 in their pockets as they walked out the doors and back to their lives. They didn't feel badly about not being chosen - the movie had helped, I'm sure.
I, on the other hand, was feeling something along the lines of
"You have GOT to be kidding me."
Jury duty.
For real.
This is what clean livin' will get you.
(To be continued...)
Monday, February 4, 2008
Movie Quote Monday
Good morning!
Starting of with a short little quote from a movie that was HOT HOT HOT in the year I graduated from high school. In college, my roommate Valerie and I thought that a guy in our ward resembled the character from the movie and repeatedly said (behind his back of course):
"Hey Goose you big stud!"
Go.
Starting of with a short little quote from a movie that was HOT HOT HOT in the year I graduated from high school. In college, my roommate Valerie and I thought that a guy in our ward resembled the character from the movie and repeatedly said (behind his back of course):
"Hey Goose you big stud!"
Go.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Got Milk?
Since the first of the year, I've been slowly reorganizing my house. It started with the food storage room and a few closets here and there. In the kitchen, I rearranged some cupboards, made the pots and pans easier to get to, cleaned out the pantry and all the drawers and generally gave everything a fresh start for the new year. It's a work in progress.
It's all very organized and kid-friendly:
I threw out some old things that I just don't use, I moved the pyrex, the bowls and small plates, the bandaids and the medicine box. My family can't find anything, even though I've shown them all the new locations. Several times. I wasn't trying to make life harder - I was just getting things to run more smoothly, without unnecessary items crowding out the everyday stuff. I love having things uncluttered. Meals are easier to prepare and it feels like I can breathe in my kitchen again.
One thing I did that goes under the heading Brilliant, is to move the kids' cereal to a different spot. The boys love their cold cereal at all times of the day, and they were constantly asking me to get them a bowl - they couldn't reach it in the cabinet up above the stove. The bowls were out of reach as well. And sometimes, I just don't want to get up...Mom's tired, you know?
So I took all the kid cereals and all the cheap plastic bowls that they love and put them down on the bottom shelf in the pantry. It's perfect - they can reach them and can have their cereal any time they want. And I don't have to get off the couch.
It's all very organized and kid-friendly:
When I opened the pantry this morning, I found this:
I guess they are looking for ease of preparation too.
Sigh.
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